Uh-Boy…

Oh. Mah. Gawd.

I don’t know if it was all the tequila or if he really was that cute, but I was seated near the. Most. Gorgeous. Man. Ever. at Hanger’s last night. And I swear, he looked right at me and smiled.  Several times.

Dreamy.

Sometimes, it sucks to be so devoted to a worthless man.

Wait, I can’t honestly say that. I don’t know why he hasn’t called, or answered my calls, or returned my e-mails, but until I know that there’s something afoot, I can’t call him worthless.

And honestly? I’m probably delusional thinking that such a young, handsome man was smiling at me. I mean, don’t I have MOM written across my forehead? Yeah, what a turn off.

Ah, well… it was nice while the delusion lasted.

And there are always my dreams.

Right?

In a Bad Place

I had thought that when Blake came home and announced that he had a new tour scheduled, that it would be a good thing. 

I was wrong.

But I really had no idea just how wrong I was. 

Because after he said he was due in New York in three weeks, he announced who his new touring partner was going to be.  For the next eighteen months.

Leslie Morgan.

What?  Why?  What did I do to deserve this?  I mean, really.  I know he needs to work and that he’s been home much too long (ask me how I know), but does he really need to go back to work with his ex-bitch?  Err, I mean his ex-girlfriend?

I don’t think so. 

But I do however, think I need a drink.

He’s been gone for six weeks now.

And I haven’t heard from him in four.

Neither has my brother nor Billy heard a word from him.  Normally, I wouldn’t worry so much about this, but for some reason, I have a very, very bad feeling.  And it’s only getting worse as time goes by.

About that drink…

Sexual Astrology

While surfing this afternoon I came across an interesting article that you can find here.  So, I first looked up myself, because if nothing else, I know my preferences better than anyone else’s.

Cancer:

Sexual Style: "Cancers don't just fall into bed," says Vega. For the most part, the extremely emotional crab wants a relationship, and once she has you in her claws, she doesn't want to let go. These intense, serious, possessive lovers zero in on one partner with whom to engage in all of their favorite sensual activities. While they may be shy initially, they're tender and deeply affectionate once they feel comfortable.

Sexually Compatible Signs: Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn, Scorpio, Pisces

Huh.  Okay.  Emotional, okay, maybe even extremely so.  I’ll admit to that.  Not wanting to let go?  Okay.  I’ll go for that too.  But possessive?  Really?  Hmmm…

So, while I pondered all that, I thought I’d look up my Cowboy’s sign as well, just out of curiosity.

Gemini:

Sexual Style: This cerebral, verbal sign is stimulated mentally first and physically second. Once you've got him excited, drag him into the bedroom before he gets distracted, since Gemini minds wander easily. Sex is sure to be hot and heavy, and probably pretty chatty. "They like to talk during sex; they like to talk about sex," says Vega. Lounging around makes those born under the sign of the twins nervous, so don't take it personally when your Gemini wants to get out of bed after he climaxes.

Sexually Compatible Signs: Libra, Aquarius, Aries, Leo, Sagittarius

Well, I am shocked.  They’re wrong from the get-go.  Cerebral?  Mentally stimulated?  My Blake?  WTF?  His mother is lying about his birth date, she has to be.  Okay, verbal I can get behind and easily distracted too, just not when sex is an option.  He’s totally focused at that point.  And what did that say?  Hot and heavy sex?  Ohhh yeaaaaaaaaah, that’s for certain.  Oh, and ::snickers:: chatty sex?  ::snerk::  I swear to the high heavens… that boy just doesn’t ever shut the hell up.  So yeah, I’m all behind chatty.

I just think that it’s really odd that our signs aren’t supposedly compatible, but here we are.  In the real world we may have our rough spots, but in the bedroom?  Not a chance.  110% together all the way…

So, was that all TMI?

Not that I care…

~Ali

The Truth Behind the Marriage Vows

…that no one tells you about.

So, being the good wife that I am, I’m sitting here reading Rick and Bubba’s Guide to the Almost Nearly Perfect Marriage by Rick Burgess & Bill “Bubba” Bussey.

Anyway, there’s this section on what ‘for better or for worse’ really means.  I was laughing along at most and then I came across one that hit a little too close to home…

For Better: He bags a deer that supplies her with enough meat to last all winter.

For Worse: He spends $4,328 on equipment and the hunting trip to do it.

Rick?  Bubba?  Have you been peeking in my windows?

::sigh::

But, you boys would be proud of me… I knew what I was getting into when I married him… I think.

~Ali

You Have (1) New…

… is Allyson Matson Naughty or Nice? question to answer.

Huh. 

Why do you care?

I mean, this Allyson Matson is married, thus making it NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. 

Not to mention the fact my husband has a gun.  Several, to be truthful.

Oh, wait… and so do I…

And they said social networking was supposed to be fun… if that’s true, tell me how my fish started up a speed dating service?