Monday, March 1, 2010

The Ties that Bind… and Break Us

I will admit that, when my phone rang early this morning, I had harbored some strange hope that it was Zac calling, asking to meet for an indulgent breakfast in lieu of waiting until our late lunch/early dinner date. But then, reality dawned and I remembered that he didn’t have my phone number.


Looking down at my display, I saw the familiar visage of my wayward husband. I was shocked on two counts: one – I hadn’t heard from him in much too long and two – it wasn’t much past 7 AM. So, he was most likely just staggering home after a long night of well, whatever he’d been up to for the past month.

“Hello?” I deadpanned. Can’t let him think that I was too eager to be talking to him. Besides, after the reaming Albie gave me after having ‘caught me in the act’, I proceeded to get extremely wasted last night and fervor was just not in my range of abilities today.

“Hey, Cookie. We need to talk.”

Ya think? And he was entirely too cheerful for my tastes. “What was your first clue? That we haven’t spoken in um, oh, let’s see… over a fucking month?

He sighed loudly into the phone. I debated hanging up on him but managed to resist. Barely. “You’re overreacting.”

Me? Me? Okay. Maybe a little. “Fine then. Explain where the fuck you’ve been.”

“We have a problem, Cookie. A serious one.”

“We? What have I done to cause any problems?” Aside from accepting a phone number from a strange man?

“Listen, it was an accident. I didn’t mean to do it, and you know I’d never do anything to hurt you intentionally…”

That was about the point where I stopped listening. He’d been out gallivanting with his ex-lover, and I could only imagine what kinds of problems have cropped up during that time. I really didn’t want to, but suddenly very vivid images were flying through my mind.

“Ali? You know I love you and that I’d never do anything to hurt you, right?”

Oh, he was talking to me again. “But?”

He hadn’t been expecting that, I don’t think. I think he was planning on hearing some sort of gushing profession of love and devotion. Sorry, currently all out. “But, well, I didn’t mean to but somehow I did anyway and…”

“You didn’t mean to do what exactly, Blake?” I knew what was coming and yet, I was still scared to death. I didn’t want to hear those four words pass through his lips. I really wanted to be overreacting, just for once, let it be my imagination. Let him have a reasonable excuse. Just this one time…

Another sigh. “I slept with Leslie.”

Obviously, no such luck for me today.

“And she thinks she’s pregnant.”

Stupid. Mother. Fucker.

I hung up.

And then I debated calling Zac and cancelling.

Next, I cried.

And when I stopped? I decided to say, ‘Fuck you, Blake’ and had every intention of going out and having a good time tonight. And my brother be damned.

I did, however, call Zac.

And told him to be ready.

Because I was a free woman.